Est. 1787
About The Scrapple
Delaware news that isn't quite news worthy.
Our Mission
The Scrapple was founded in 1787 by a group of who felt that Delaware was being dramatically underserved by accurate reporting. After careful consideration, they decided the solution was not more accuracy, but less.
The Scrapple has delivered the news Delaware deserves — not necessarily the news Delaware needs, and certainly not the news Delaware asked for. We cover politics, culture, and local affairs with the same level of journalistic rigor: minimal.
We are proud to be the only publication in the First State with a corrections policy that reads, in its entirety: 'We regret nothing.'
Editorial Standards
All stories published in The Scrapple undergo a rigorous editorial process that includes at most one person reading them before publication. That person is the author.
The Scrapple is a satirical publication. All articles are works of fiction. Any resemblance to actual events, living persons, or functioning state government is coincidental and frankly surprising.
Our Staff
Johnny Appleseed
Editor-in-Chief
Johnny has led The Scrapple's editorial team since 2003, when he won the position in a coin flip. He previously covered the Delaware General Assembly for six years and has never fully recovered. He lives in Houston with his wife, two children, and an opinion about the Chesapeake & Delaware Canal that he will share with you whether you ask or not.
Georgia Peachman
Managing Editor
Georgia oversees day-to-day operations at The Scrapple, which she describes as 'like herding cats, but the cats have press credentials and strong opinions about zoning.' She holds a master's degree in journalism from the University of Delaware and a deep personal grudge against the Oxford comma.
Hank Ham
Political Correspondent
Hank has covered Delaware politics for eleven years and has attended more ribbon-cutting ceremonies than any human being should. He once interviewed three sitting governors in a single afternoon and describes the experience as 'torture.' His work has been cited by the Delaware State Legislature as 'not helpful.'
Earl E. Eagle
Culture Desk
Earl covers arts, entertainment, dining, and anything else that doesn't fit in the other sections. He is the only staff member who has reviewed every Wawa grand opening in New Castle County since 2011 and considers this his greatest professional achievement. His star ratings are non-negotiable.
Henrietta Blue
Investigative Reporter
Henrietta joined The Scrapple after a distinguished career at three newspapers that no longer exist. She specializes in long-form investigations into topics of questionable public interest, including a landmark 2019 series on why the Dover DMV line moves the way it does. The series won no awards but also generated no comment section activity.
Disclaimer
The Scrapple is a satirical publication. All content is fictional and intended for entertainment purposes only. Nothing published here should be taken as factual reporting, legal advice, medical guidance, or a reliable indicator of what is actually happening in Delaware.
If you have read a Scrapple article and are now concerned about a real-world situation, we encourage you to consult an actual news source. We recommend several. We will not name them here, as we consider them competition.
The Scrapple is not responsible for decisions made based on our reporting. This includes, but is not limited to, investments, votes, social media posts, arguments at Thanksgiving, or strongly-worded letters to the editor of a different publication.